Never read film reviews

In between my study madness I had to (yes I had to!) see SATC2 in Gold Class with the girls on the weekend.  It was a necessity - regardless of how bad the reviews were!

To start with, here is a list of people who I think probably won't like the film:

• Men
• Gay men
• Intellectuals
• Old people
• Anyone who doesn't like Beyonce or Liza Minnelli

I was talking to a gay friend yesterday who gave the film 1/10 and I started to think about why.  His reasons included that the film was too long, Samantha was a parody of herself, it was racially insensitive and that the only good part was Liza Minnelli.

Without being offensive, I think this movie doesn't appeal to gay men in the same way the tv show used to.  The films have had to move on from single life for all four gals as their audience moves on to another stage in their lives as well.  The movie had so much more to offer by way of its message (as opposed to the first movie which had huge emotional climaxes). 

This film doesn't nearly climax as much as the first one, but it does give us some insight into the characters, their experiences with the changes in their lives and how they're coping with babies, marriage, careers, men and the like (almost like real people - minus a few of the designer items, fabulous luxury holidays and huge custom built walk in wardrobes).

Without ruining the story for those that haven't seen it yet, here are some of the things I took away from the movie:

• Marriage and relationships are hard work
• Kids are hard work
• Jobs and bosses are hard work
• It's ok to be insecure sometimes and admitting that you find life hard isn't the worst thing in the world
• Friends are there to help you get through life with a smile (or a cocktail!)
• Life is what you make it, no matter whether the world agrees with your choices as to how you live it

I cannot begin to tell you how much I appreciated the underlying sentiments in the film which made the crassness and sillyness of the film a little more worthwhile.  As for racial stereotyping criticisms, people naturally look to the differences between culture when they go to another country.  I don't think it is insensitive for them to make a joke about it and not take themselves too seriously - it's a hollywood film for goodness sake! It wasn't a documentary!

If you expect a light, fun, girly movie that might include a cocktail or two with your girls then that is exactly how it will play out.

Grab your girls and check it out - you'll get a laugh if nothing else.  I'm so ready for the backlash from those of you who didn't like it.  Bring it.

Elle

Another twist (but not my ankle this time)

The power of positive thought is said to have unheralded benefits.  Last week when I felt that my week would only get worse, it did, because I thought it would and I let it. 

Today is another day and the positive attitude I have maintained for the last week has paid off and last week seems like a distant memory.  Order has been restored and I am able to function again without the bitterness I carried earlier last week.

The music was pumping on my ipod this morning on the way to uni. I am wearing my new gumboots and it is pouring rain today in Sydney (AND yes I have managed to fit my sprained ankle into a boot!) AND it is the last day of semester!!  I have stepped in every possible puddle I could find today - much to my childish delight.  Speaking of childish delight - how cute is this pic below? I saw two little girls in their raincoats walking to school this morning and it was so sweet!

Despite the huge uphill battle ahead of me in terms of preparation for exams, I'm banking on the power of positive thought to keep the confidence and momentum going so that come exam time, I'm feeling as good as I do today.

Happy weekend - I've got plenty of study to do (starting tonight).

Elle

BTW - I do not believe in that book/video "The Secret" or anything of that kind, I'm just suggesting you have control around how you react to situations to improve it them (which is entirely to your advantage).  I'm not suggesting I changed my thinking to bring me a nice new car or anything  but that would be fun too ;)

Oh and here is an iphone pic of my boots.

Competition

Some people would classify me in the Type A personality category; I'm a perfectionist, competitive, impatient, and a highly strung kind of person.  I definitely don't love the category, but I do fit well into the box.  If you ask my fiancée about how emotional I am he will say I am quick to react angrily and that I apply my standards to everyone else in a me-centred universe (which clearly makes it hard for people around me who don't live up to my high expectations!).  A side note - i've also heard this type of behaviour leads to heart attacks - go figure!

Being a perfectionist and competitive can lead to great success.  Many of the great leaders, thinkers and sports people in history have had these personality traits.  My undoing is in the competition.  It's where I am at my most vulnerable and insecure and I crave winning more than I should.

On Tuesday night, I was playing netball (yes I have taken up a team sport).  I can see you frowning thinking, oh god help your team mates and the people on the other side (Mum - I know you are smiling at that).  The mature part of me has learned not to be too competitive.  I embraced the game and am happy to just have fun and get the exercise at the same time every week.  But we have lost the game every week.  Every game.  LOST. 

As we began to improve each week, the competitiveness came out in me.  I updated my twitter and facebook status with our improvements, how close we had come to a win and to be honest I had a feeling we could win last week.

The courts were a little wet.  It has been raining in Sydney for pretty much 2 weeks now.  It was the end of the second half and the game was close.  I was playing goal keeper (defensive position for those of you who aren't into sport).  With not long in the game to go, I lunged forward for an intercept and in what felt like slow motion (that I couldn't do anything about) my right ankle rolled 180 degrees and I fell with a huge thud on the ashpalt.  I already knew it wasn't good.  The pain shot through my foot like fire.  I took in deep breaths, sucking the air down and all I could think about was the fact that we had come so close to winning the game and I had just ruined our chances!  I ribbed my bib off and handed it to the girls and told them to go on playing while I lay beside the court with a frozen water bottle on my ankle feeling sorry for myself.

The whistle blew not long after my injury and the girls came over.  Much to my surprise... WE HAD WON and instantly the pain disappeared!! Well.... not really... but for a moment there I swear it did!  It was all worth it!  I think I was more excited than everyone else. 

After less than half a week on crutches, it wasn't worth it.  I've got to stop with the competitive behaviour... it never seems to do me any good.  Damn you A type personality.

I know I know... it's not the personality type - it's just me.  I'll work it out eventually... maybe.

ps.  I've ordered some gumboots for those of you who were interested.  Stay tuned for pics when they arrive.

Elle

Maternal instincts

Lots of people have them. I would generally include myself in that group of people who have them. Maternal instincts however do not equate to wanting or needing babies and that is where my story begins.

Maternal instincts can be found at an early age. A good indicator of them is when you see a child with a doll. They clothe it, bathe it, feed it, dress it and generally take care of it.

I hated dolls as a kid.

I wouldn't be caught dead with one. The few porcelain ones I had were certainly not chosen by me. My sister had all the Barbies.  I preferred Big Bird and teddies of all kinds. I didn't dress them up either! Psychologists however insist that the doll instinct is not the precursor to parental/maternal instinct in a human being. I would say that it unequivocally is an indicator of maternal instinct at its most basic level.

Another example of maternal instinct can be seen where an older child gets a younger sibling and they take care of them. This is where I believe my maternal instincts came from. I would help by getting the talc, finding the nappies, making the sibling breakfast as they got older and I eventually babysat said sibling while Mum was in the shower, or on the phone, without even realising it. The third sibling came along in my life, and I practically took over. Then... the babysitting never ended.

Instincts in the animal kingdom at their most basic level, are usually a fixed and rigid thing, but we, as human beings, are a more advanced kind (at least I hope we are) and our intelligence gives us the ability to override those instincts or refine them in a way that is suitable to our needs, our community and our lifestyle. In other words, we have the ability to shape those instincts to suit our situation.

Here's my gripe... if you haven't worked it out already... maternal instincts do not necessitate a pathway to having babies.

For some people, they believe this is absolutely the case. Maternal instincts = I must be a mother = it was that which I was pre-ordained to do = no other choice.

We are an intelligent species. Feminism has come a long way, but perhaps not far enough. I don't use that word lightly, I would hardly consider myself a feminist. However I do thank feminism for the progress that has been made thus far. Why is it however, that there is a belief among our species (men and women alike), that women who have maternal instincts will therefore produce babies. The equation is flawed. The equation should look like this:

X has maternal instincts = the choice to have babies or not is a considered, intelligent and educated decision, not a pre-determined one outside of their consciousness.

Similarly...

X has no maternal instincts = the choice to have babies or not is a considered, intelligent and educated decision, not a pre-determined one outside of their consciousness.

I am not an expert on the subject of human behaviour of maternal anything, but it rocked me recently when someone asked, are you really not going to have babies? When I said that would be my preferred future direction (i.e. not having kids), they looked at me like I was some kind of alien lifeform.

It's simple people. I'm an educated, open minded, intelligent woman who doesn't feel the need to have babies to be satisfied with my life. It's a choice.

**This post in no way suggests that I won't have babies, ever. I am simply pointing out that human beings are more capable than we give ourselves credit for, and instead of falling prey to our animal kingdom instincts, we are truly able to choose a life for ourselves that is fulfilling in many ways other than procreation**

Elle

Winter in Sydney

Have you ever noticed how quickly the puddles form and the rivers in the gutter flow when it rains in Sydney even for a short time?  It is truly amazing.

Today I honestly could not work out what to do about the shoe situation.  I like shoes - to look at... but not to wear.  Me and shoes have a history.

As a child I would run around barefoot the entire winter with my mother yelling at me to put some socks on.  Years later she would tell me not to go outside in my socks and to put some shoes on.  But now I've got plenty of shoes and socks and I'm happy to wear them but none of them are truly suitable for a Sydney winter.

You know the kind of winter I'm talking about - it rains... non-stop for days at a time.  It's not cold but it's wet. 

Today I procrastinated even turning up to uni because I couldn't work out what shoes I could wear which would prevent my feet from getting wet!! Pathetic I know - but this is a serious problem!!

Despite how truly unfashionable gumboots are, I think it is time that I got some.  I jumped online (in class of course) and browsed the web for some slightly decent looking gumboots.  I'm thinking about getting these - they're kind of funky and I could wear my skinny jeans with them.  What do you think?

Elle